Walk into any mall in Kenya and it’s the same show, different day.
Whether you’re in Sarit, Garden City, Westgate, or even your neighborhood mini-mall — the cast doesn’t change.
You’ll always run into these seven types of shoppers:
- The Browsing Graduate
They came with no budget, no plan, and no shame.
They’ll try on six pairs of shoes, ask for price breakdowns, and still leave saying:
“Nitarudi baada ya mshahara.”
- The TikTok Tour Guide
Phone in hand. Tripod in bag. Looking for “aesthetic background” and good lighting.
You’ll hear:
“Hey guys! I’m at XYZ Mall today and we’re doing a mini haul!”
Shopping? No.
Creating content? Definitely.
Disturbing other shoppers? Without fail.
- The Lost Dad
Doesn’t know where the food court is.
Wife’s at LC Waikiki. Kids are at the gaming zone.
He’s just… wandering.
Looks like a tourist in his own country. Might ask you where the toilets are.
- The Window Shopper with Taste
They walk into every designer shop confidently, smell perfumes they can’t afford (yet), and leave with dignity.
“One day… one day.”
And honestly? We respect the vision 💅🏽
- The Bargain Hunter
Their mission is one word: SALE.
If it’s not red-tagged or “buy one get one,” they’re not interested.
They will even negotiate with the cashier:
“Hakuna discount ya cash?”
- The “I’m Just Accompanying Her” Boyfriend
He’s standing outside the changing room with his arms crossed, holding her handbag.
He’s been here for 3 hours.
Pray for him.
- The Fast Food Philosopher
They came for chicken, but now they’re suddenly reflecting on life at the food court.
Looking at people. Contemplating.
Probably ordering fries with Fanta passion while journaling in their mind.
Let’s be honest… you saw yourself somewhere in there 😏
Which one are YOU when you go to the mall?
Or did we miss your type?
Tag a friend and confess using #TeleSkyShoppers

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